you are everything

So yeah... the Panic At The Disco concert was Thursday night. Neither darksylvia or I got to meet the band after all because Artist Arena - the company handling the fan club and promotions and the meet & greet contests - completely fucked it up. You can read a little more about that in darksylvia's LJ here. I don't feel like talking about it. I was kind of okay about missing it at the time, but now? I'm really *not* okay with it.

Anyway, the post-big event blues have hit me hard. I'm looking at the pictures and stories that other people are posting of the show I was at and the one the following night, and I don't know if I'll even bother posting my pictures. The ones that turned out look just the same as everyone else's. The few video clips I took are just bits and pieces of songs and the sound quality isn't all that great on them. So I came home with nothing particularly exceptional. Didn't even get a chance to look at the merch booth, much less buy anything.

I did get to meet Eric Ronick and Shane Valdés before the show, and talked to Shane on and off during and after the show as well. He's really cool, and much better looking in person. The pics I've seen of him really don't do him justice. Eric is awesome, but I didn't get to meet up with him again after the show and have him sign my Black Gold CD. :-( Zack (FYI, it is spelled with a "k" - I checked) is also completely awesome. I really felt like he was pissed off on our behalf that we weren't given the right info for the meet & greet and had to miss it. Even though his first priority is keeping the guys safe and happy, he does a damn good job of keeping the fans safe and happy too, you know?

The concert itself was great, but I'm just not physically able to make it through shows like this. I managed to stay down in the pit with darksylvia for the first two bands, but after that, I had to leave her and find someplace where I could breathe and actually get off my feet for a few minutes. Sat on the floor with another woman the same age as me - who was there with her two young teenage daughters - through most of Motion City Soundtrack's set. And I didn't even attempt to get back up front for Panic even though part of me wanted to. Of course, if I had gone back up front, I wouldn't have run into Shane again. He was right out in the audience and was very friendly and willing to talk to me. Nice guy.

I guess the only other thing I have to say is that I'm really glad that the other show I'm going to on this tour - the Washington DC show on April 30th - is all reserved seating and I have really good seats. A seat. That I can sit in. Yeah - I know everyone will be standing, but I can still sit now and then if I need to. It sucks to be old and in less-than-ideal health. :-( Such a lovely note to end this post on, but there you go. ::shrug::

So... I just had a particularly violent coughing spell and... ( not too gross, but it seems considerate to put it behind a cut anyway... )
I so adore you guys for your healing vibes and kind words and I hope you'll forgive me for not replying to each of you personally. I do a crappy job of keeping up on your lives, and yet you're continually there for me. I hope you all know how much that means to me. ::hugs::

In my one bit of good news, darksylvia and I both managed to snag presale VIP tickets (which sold out in about 7 minutes) to the Panic at the Disco concert in San Francisco on April 10th. YAY!!!!!!! Not only do I get to see Panic perform, I also get to see Motion City Soundtrack and The Hush Sound (and another band I don't know) - both of whom I also love - who are opening for Panic. And just as important - I get to meet darksylvia! I ♡ her so much - even though because she got me addicted to Panic - and now we get to squee about them together and in person!! I'm so excited!!!!!!!!!!!!!! (Panic may have dropped the ! from their name, but there are still plenty of reasons to use it in relation to them. hehe) Thank the deity-of-your-choice that it's not until April. Plenty of time for me to get over this damned demon supercold.

As of right now, I'm noticeably worse than I was before I went to the doctor on Monday rather than starting to get better. My throat is even more red than it was and I'm so zonked out... can barely keep my eyes open. Can't eat much of anything. Coughing up yellow stuff now - wasn't doing that before. Mom has a call into the doctor for me - we'll see what they say. Both Mom and Dad have more minor versions of this bug now too. I almost - ALMOST - want them to put me in the hospital for the duration so Mom and Dad won't have to take care of me. Will keep you posted when possible, and when I can't, someone will have access to this LJ to update you for me.

Having said all that, I'm probably making a big deal out of nothing. Keep your fingers crossed that it is indeed nothing more than we already know it to be.